This is a post I wrote one year ago today after my last, first date
September 19th 10:57pm
Eeeek.
The "D" word...
DATE.
I am not good at this dating business. I'm awkward and weird and i am never sure of myself or the right things to say. Most of the time on dates all i do is watch the minuets drag by and pray that they'll pass quicker so that I can get home to wash my hair, or organize my dresser drawers or something else equally lame.
Tonight was my first "Provo" date, and as i sit here in my bed going over it in my mind all i can do is question myself, and analyze what he said...what i said...
uuughhhh why did i say that??!
what did he mean by that??
should i have said more?
should he have said more?
why didn't he say more?
why didn't i?
why did i wear that?
did he like it?
i wonder what he's thinking..
will we go out again?
It never ends.
And don't even think that these questions are the end of the "dating craziness" they are only the beginning. NOW, i have to worry about whether or not i add him on facebook...do i text him tomorrow and say thanks again? am i supposed to ask him for a second date? Should i make the first move? is the ball in my court or his? and if the ball is in my court WHAT THE HECK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH IT?
throw it?
keep it?
kick it?
hit it?
and if i am supposed to do any of the above listed verbs HOW am i supposed to do it?
I've never been very athletic so more likely than not my performance in the dating game will be less than impressive.
dumb. so dumb.
HEEEELP!
Somebody get me a dating advisor.
and a batch of cookie dough.
Super glad I never have to deal with that again.
